Copyright © 2019 · here for wonder by Gail Walter -- All Rights Reserved

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Let It Not Be Said

November 26, 2019


Yes, let it not

be said

that I have 



that I have


Let it not be said.


Let it not be said

that I left it

left it there

to die

that I did not

touch it with my toe

dislodge it

watch it fall


Let it not be said

that I overdid it

didn’t do enough

let it go 

without even 


let it not be said


let it not be said

that we will not

do anything 

in response

to this

because we failed to 



Let it not be said

that there was nothing

to say

at all

nothing to 


this absence


Let it not be said


let silence

fall with

a deep clang

to catch our 


vibrate across

the wood floor

wake us up


Let it not be said that 

I will recognize you

if I did not 

know you

that in a crowd

you would stand out

and my eyes 

would follow

the back of you

that I would


to catch up

that I would touch

your elbow

look into 

your eyes

and know you

as mine


Let it not be said

that I didn’t

give it my best shot

that you didn’t smell

of fennel or cumin

in my nose

that I didn’t move

with the smell of you

in my nostrils

each breath you

on the pillow

next to me


Cotton and cumin

you and the bed

the landscape of the 

unmade bed

in relief

but you



something steady

something steady

that’s all I ask


And me

pooled eyes

Of sorry

without the balance

that makes it


no nothing to 

offer you


Are you not ready

to give this up

to call it by the name

on the tip

of our tongues

for so long.

that signifies



that ends

even if you try

to call it back

even as it brushes past you

as it leaves

without turning

without stopping.


Let it not be said

that love is obvious

that it stands

by you

in the ruins


Let it not be said

that Easter Sunday

slipped by


a candle

or a prayer

of thanks

to something


but not trusted



warm in the chest

something to hold


something to bow down to

something to look up to

something to pray for

for salvation

for forgiveness

for it all to end.


Let it not be said

that we did not try

to make this

this thing


that we did not

change the angle

more than once

to see if it was

something we could use

more than once

that we could

perhaps keep

and hold

from this day 



Let it not be said

that we did not veer

away from it

the edge

the end

of everything

that we did not

quake with fear

and look away

for a moment

for a day

for a lifetime


but not this

not this sheer drop


from all we know


Let it not be said

that we did not try

to ignore it

the verge

the drop

our approach


Let it not be said 

that we did not try

to hold


in the face of it

that we did not


and that nothing

heard us


Let it not be said

that we were 

in any way


an answer

any sound

any sign

to reverse things


Let it not be said

that I didn’t

want this

that I didn’t 

chase this

that I didn’t catch it

and hold it

and mould it to myself


Let it not be said

more than anything

let us not

wrap it in words

that make it real

if we do not look

does it exist

if we do not look

will it go away


Let it not be said

when a heart


it makes no sound.



Art: Photo by Toa Heftiba on Unsplash

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If we had a keen vision and feeling of all ordinary human life, it would be like hearing the grass grow and the squirrel's heart beat, and we should die of that roar which lies on the other side of silence. 

George Eliot

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I live in hazard and infinity. The cosmos stretches around me, meadow on meadow of galaxies, reach on reach of dark space, steppes of stars, oceanic darkness and light. There is no amenable god in it, no particular concern or particular mercy. Yet everywhere I see a living balance, a rippling of tension, an enormous yet mysterious simplicity, an endless breathing of light. And I comprehend that being is understanding that I must exist in hazard but that the whole is not in hazard. Seeing and knowing this is being conscious; accepting it is being human.

John Fowles, Aristos


“To love. To be loved. To never forget your own insignificance. To never get used to the unspeakable violence and the vulgar disparity of life around you. To seek joy in the saddest places. To pursue beauty to its lair. To never simplify what is complicated or complicate what is simple. To respect strength, never power. Above all, to watch. To try and understand. To never look away. And never, never to forget.”

Arundhati Roy